Thursday, March 22, 2007

Jokes for the John... or Did you hear about the preacher who ruined his organ on a hymn?

I've lived in the same apartment now for ten years. Old 1920s structure with lots of character, odd elderly neighbors, and drafty windows. When I first moved into here I noticed in the bathroom that there was this strange little hook that was mounted right across from the toilet.

It really was useless for hanging anything on, but I thought maybe it was for a wash cloth. The other thing was for a hook it was decidedly dick-like. Then at a used book store I found a book called "More Jokes for the John".

Finally I realized the purpose of the hook. For almost ten years this book has been hanging there. I'm sure it's gotten more attention than anything else in my home. I mean if you're visiting and nature calls you can't miss it. More Jokes for the John has gotten me through many a hangover morning, or bout with food poisoning from Mexican food. It's a great bathroom read because the jokes are so inane that they seem fresh each time I read them because I've completely forgotten them from the last time.

Indicative of the time it was published the jokes are sexist, sexy, and just plain stupid. Just the thing to take your mind off of your business. The subjects of the jokes mainly run in a few categories: Horny men trying to trick a woman into having sex; horny women trying to have sex, prostitutes talking about sex, big breasts, homosexuals, and how wives are all shrews.

One of the jokes that has stumped people for years is this one:
"Two little worms were crawling in the garden, one of them stopped and the other crawled right on. "
That's it... Any interpretation as to why this is a joke would be most welcome. I've had suggestions that the punchline was left out, but I don't think so.
Anyway... for your browsing pleasure here are some of the cartoons from this book.

More to come...


Aaron said...

I love these hokey old joke books, too!

I think the worm joke is a double-entendre: "one of them stopped and the other crawled right on." Which could mean "crawled right on past," or "crawled right on top of the other worm."

All that double-entendre for a joke that's just not that funny! ;-) I love the cartoons, though...when I was a kid, I used to root through my dad's girlie magazines (hidden under the towels, where he thought I didn't know where to look), because they had some funny cartoons like this, too. (Obviously, a little raunchier, but along the same lines.)

BC said...

Aaron's right, I think. 'Crawled right on' top of the other one. Boy, you're smart.
When I was a kid, my dad kept Penthouses in the can, and so many of those cartoons and 'funny' pictures are indelibly etched into my mind because of their grossness. Playboys had classier cartoons.

Anonymous said...

John, you know what comes to mind when I think of your apartment? That gorilla-esque coat, and the glow in the dark traffic light hanging in the bathroom. My parents had one just like it when I was very young, younger than 3 for sure.


Johnny C said...

I'll admit to the coat, but glow in the dark traffic light? Hmmm... I think you've got your bathrooms mixed up...

Anonymous said...

OMG! I remember reading this book when I was a kid. My folks always had it hanging around the house. I remember my mother being terribly embarrassed when she got a call from my 1st grade teacher asking her to come and pick up the book! Apparently I had taken it for show and tell. LOL I was a kid and the pictures were funny!

My parents have both since passed away and over the years I have tried looking for the old book. She must have burned it after that day, because I could never find it again.

If you could open the cover and tell me the publishing information on the book, I would be so greatful. I would love to find these books again ... for my own nostalgic reasons. my email is ... thank you so much!

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Bobby said...

I remember this book fromt he sixties. My friend Ed deLa Montanya had it. I think it had apoem in it called Me Mother. It's mothers day 2011 May 8. I read the following to my wife and I do believe she figured it out within seconds. Here is what YOU asked and here is what SHE said.

One of the jokes that has stumped people for years is this one:
"Two little worms were crawling in the garden, one of them stopped and the other crawled right on. "
She said the one worm craled on the back of the first worm to get some.
Now how I see it this joke is aplay on words misdirected like this Joke
A man rode to town on Sunday Stayed three days and returned home ont he same Sunday.

Summary: Two worms, First one stopped. The second climbed right on to get some. Think Hugh Hefner! SEX Dumb joke but that's how we see the answer.

Anonymous said...

I referred to your post from 2007. IT fit beautifully with the topic.
Not sure if you are still up and running. You will get hits from the post though.

Johnny C said...

Thanks for linking... I'm pretty much not posting anymore... but I'm still keeping the old posts open.